Asta Paredes

as Chrissy

Catherine Corcoran

as Lauren

Lloyd Kaufman

as Lee Harvey Herzkauf

Zac Amico

as Zack

Vito Trigo

as Leonardo

Babette Bombshell

as Principal Westly

Clay von Carlowitz

as Eugene

Tara E. Miller

as Rachel Ruysch

Mike Baez

as Donatello

Mark Quinnette

as Michaelangelo

Josh Potter

as Kevin the Duck Monster / Jock

Debbie Rochon

as Coach Kotter

Stefan Dezil

as Slater

Brenda Rickert

as Aunt Bee

Ron Jeremy

as God

Nicola Fiore

as Ms. Bigguns

Joe Fleishaker

as Lauren 6 Months Later

Charlotte Kaufman

as Audrey Benjamin

Doug Sakmann

as Flag Cretin / Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D.

Monique Dupree

as Shower Girl

Nico Praz

as Tromorganic Burger Victim

Mark Torgl

as School Janitor

Stan Lee

as Narrator

Lemmy Kilmister

as The President

Robert Bozek

as Named Him Randall

John Patrick Brennan

as Jeffrey the Hazmat Goon

Teresa Hui

as Zac's Rejection Girl

Nadia White

as Shower Girl

Brandy Mason

as Shower Girl Brandy

James D. Rolfe

as The Angry Video Game Nerd

Corina Taylor

as Tro-Gasm Girl

Bailey Jay

as Cameo

John Migliore

as Tromaville Citizen

Meg Carriero

as Asian School Girl

Lauren Sylvester

as Eugene's Tranny Friend

Heather Cahill

as Shower Girl